


Hold me close, Don't let go, Watch me burn

by AgnesTomlinson



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alpha Harry, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - College/University, Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Beta Liam, Beta Zayn, Friends to Lovers, Implied Mpreg, M/M, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Omega Louis, Omega Niall, Rape, Underage - Freeform, Univerity Of West London, nouis friendship
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-03-10
Updated: 2014-08-21
Packaged: 2018-01-15 07:18:33
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 11
Words: 16,180
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1296256
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AgnesTomlinson/pseuds/AgnesTomlinson
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Harry and Louis were close friends before Louis found out he was an omega and got sent to a boarding school. Will they ever meet again? And what will happen if they do...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

He and Harry had been friends ever since they met each other in the kindergarten when Louis was five and Harry was two, back then Louis was taking care of Harry and making sure he didn't get hurt. Years later when Harry was seven and Louis was ten they were still friends and played with each other every day after school. This continued until Louis was fourteen and Harry was eleven, that's when it changed. Louis went into his first heat and stayed home, hiding in his room and trying to get through it. He had had to go home from school at lunch time and it was evening now.

He couldn't do much, it was his first heat and he wasn't prepared at all. He had thought he was a beta, male omegas were very uncommon so he had never thought he could be one.

He was too far gone in his heat to notice the door opening it was first as the smell hit him as he noticed. He whimpered, more slick running out from his hole, the smell was familiar but so different from anything he had ever smelled before. But when he looked up at the person that had enter he felt his heart sink. That was not good, not at all. Why was his step father in his room, looking at him with dark lust clouded eyes.  
  
All he had wished for today was an alpha to help him through his heat but never his step dad. Suddenly he felt scared, he knew how this was going to end and he didn't want it to happen like that, he didn't not want his first heat to end like this. He backed up on his bed, curling up against the corner of the room, trying to protect his naked body. Mark took three steps, slamming the door shut before towering over Louis.

"Hands and knees" he said, his voice deeper than ever and somehow Louis couldn't help but obey. It was his alpha voice, their teacher had told him about it once, about how alphas could use a special voice to make omegas do as they told. Louis felt exposed like this, bum up in the air, slick running down his thighs and hole clenching around nothing. His legs were shaking and he was just waiting for something to happen. He knew what would come but he was still not prepared when it did. He screamed out when his step dad's dick stretched his hole out, he knew it would hurt, in heat or not, but he wasn't prepared and he did not want this. Not at all and he could not help the tears that ran down his cheeks. He had wanted someone to fill him up all day but this was not what he had wished for.

It didn't take long before Mark's knot was starting to swell inside him and Louis shook his head, as if he shook it enough everything would go away. He was sobbing and his dick was rock hard and he was so ashamed. Mark was hitting his prostate with every thrust and Louis could feel his own orgasm growing close, he was surprised he hadn't cum yet. Usually omegas could get multiplied orgasms when they were in heat but he wasn't really enjoying this. The whole situation was wrong and Louis wanted it to stop. _Stop, stop, stop._

Before Mark's knot could swell and knot him Louis came over the bed sheets. He cried out loudly and bit his lip hard, drawing blood. Mark grunted from behind him and then slammed into Louis a last time, his knot swelling to it's biggest form and making it impossible for him to pull out. His seed filled Louis up and Louis closed his eyes, eyelashes heavy with tears.

A moment later and the door was slammed open, Louis kept his eyes shut and he heard Mark swear at the people before his knot disappeared quickly and he was pulled away from Louis. Louis collapsed against the bed and he felt someone stick something into his arm. Seconds later and he felt his body relax and the unbearable heat sip out from him. He heard his mum talk and someone was stroking his naked back. His mind was screaming at them to stop touching him, the touch was gentle and meant to be relaxing but Louis couldn't stand it. He felt dirty. _Dirty, dirty, dirty,_ his mind chanted.

He would never be clean after this, his body was used and he felt so filthy. He wanted to disappear so he pressed his eyes closed harder than before and hid his face into the mattress, trying to get invisible. A blanket was laid over him and people were still talking, one of them his mum the others' voices he couldn't recognize but he didn't care. He didn't care who was talking to his mum because he still had his step father's seed inside him and it was all so wrong. _Wrong, wrong, wrong_. He didn't want to stay here. He wanted to go away. Maybe even die. It didn't matter. He didn't care. As long as he could disappear.

"Louis darling, we have to take you to the hospital." His mum's voice was close but it felt as if she was miles away. She couldn't get to him. Louis had walls around him now, making it impossible for anyone to get close. A hand was stroking his hair. His eyes snapped open and Louis shot up, curling up into the corner of the bed once again, using the light blue blanket someone had placed on him to cover himself. He still felt exposed, everyone in the room had already seen it, seen _him_. He quickly scanned the room, his mum was in front of him, she had tears on her cheeks and she looked just as stressed as she always did when the girls weren't doing as she said. His sisters weren't in the room and Louis was so thankful for that, if they had seen him like this nothing would be the same. But still, nothing would be the same now. Mark wasn't in the room either and Louis let out a breathe he hadn't realized he was holding in. Other than his mum there were three others. All men but none of them were looking at him with lust filled eyes, they all looked at him sympathetically and Louis wanted them to go away (almost as much as Louis himself wanted to go away). He didn't know any of them but they were all wearing the same dark blue uniforms with a small text telling him they worked at the hospital. Louis didn't want to go to the hospital but he didn't want to stay here either. He just wanted to float away and be forgotten.

"Louis please.." His mum pleaded and Louis looked at her with wide eyes, pulling the blanket closer around his small body. He had always been smaller than other guys in his age but he had never thought more into it, but now he knew that he was small because he was an omega. Omegas were small and alphas big, making it easy for them to dominate over omegas. It wasn't fair. Louis had never wanted to be an omega. He wanted to be a beta so he could find someone he loved and not care about heats or ruts or anything. Just be normal. But he was an omega and now his whole future was ruined. He could never live a normal life. Male omegas were rare and people somehow found it okay to take advantage over them. Louis had heard too many stories about them getting kidnapped, raped, sold and used for porn. He didn't want to be one of them. He was fourteen and his step dad had just raped him. _Rape, rape, rape_. He was freaking out now and it seemed as the others noticed, one of the men bent down in front of him, keeping distance as if Louis was an animal and that one step wrong would make him attack. Louis didn't think he had the strength to move at all.

"Can you take a deep breath for me Louis?" The man asked, his voice wasn't as deep as Mark's had been and it was gentle instead of forceful. Louis took a shaky breath, looking into the man's deep blue eyes. His eyes were darker than Louis' own, Louis' eyes had a gray tune and were more ice blue than clear blue as the man's in front of him were.

"Good, do you think you could stand up Louis?" Louis didn't understand why the man said his name in the end of the sentence, it was clear that he was talking to Louis but it calmed Louis in some way to hear the man say his name. Louis shook his head no, he couldn't stand up. He couldn't move at all. All his limbs felt heavy and like they didn't belong to him. Maybe Mark claimed them as his own, when he took everything from Louis, he took his body too. Nothing belonged to Louis right now. He was used. _Used, used, used._

"That's okay. We will have to lift you then Louis, is that okay with you? Can we touch you?" The man was asking for his permission but Louis couldn't give it to him. He didn't want any man to touch him. He didn't want anyone to touch him ever again. He shook his head quickly and the man nodded.

"Will you let your mum carry you? Or we could get an other woman to help you, would that be better Louis?" Louis hesitated a moment before nodding, his mum could help him. She could touch him, Louis knew she would never hurt him. She was also an omega and she was his mother so it was okay.

"Your mum can carry you Louis?" The man asked, making sure that that was what Louis had meant and didn't want them to call in an other woman. Louis nodded slowly, telling the man that it was okay that his mum helped him. The man smiled before nodding at Jay. She walked over and slowly put one arm under Louis' knees and the other under his armpits and around his back. Louis wrapped an arm around her shoulders, letting her carry him bridal style. It didn't seem as if it was much effort for her to carry him down the stairs and out to the ambulance that was parked outside their house. But then again Louis was small and not heavy at all. The men who had been in his room walked in front of them and opened the door to the back of the vehicle. His mum carefully laid him down onto the small bed that was inside the ambulance and Louis looked at her with scared eyes, not waiting her to leave but not daring to ask her to stay. She seemed to understand though and held his hand tightly through the short trip.

Things moved fast when they got to the hospital, Louis stayed on the bed and they drove him around with him and he understood that it had to be small wheels under it.   
They drove him to a room and his mum helped him onto the other bed which was bigger and more comfortable. It didn't take long for Louis to pass out.


	2. Chapter 2

_"There's a school in north London for omegas only, I think you could like it there"_   
_"But I want to stay here mum, all my friends are here."_   
_"I know darling, but it will be better this way."_   
_"Promise you and my sisters will come and visit?"_   
_"Of course. I promise."_   
_"I love you mum."_   
_"I love you too Boo bear."_

***

  
***Two months after the rape***

It still bothered him. That he didn't have the chance to say Goodbye to Harry before he left. He had been kept at the hospital overnight and his mum had packed his stuff so he could leave by lunch so he hadn't had a chance to say farewell to his friend. It bothered him that he didn't know if Harry knew why he had left, that he hadn't gotten a chance to explain himself. But Louis was sure Harry knew, Harry's mum Anne and Louis' mum were great friends so Jay had probably told her and Anne probably told Harry. But what if they hadn't? What if Harry thought that Louis just left him? It bothered Louis so much that some nights he couldn't sleep.

His mum had lied to him also, she didn't visit. She didn't contact him at all, she just left him off at the school with a kiss on his cheek. That was two months ago and now he was stuck in this boring school. Everyone at the school was omegas, girls and boys in age of twelve to eighteen, even the teachers were omegas and all of them had to take suppressants to hold back their heats (and to keep them from getting pregnant, which shouldn't be a problem since alphas were strictly forbidden to enter the school).

The doctors had said Louis was lucky to not get pregnant but Louis didn't feel very lucky. If he had been lucky then he wouldn't have been raped in the first place. What had happened to Mark, he didn't know. Maybe he was still living with Louis' mum and sisters or they had sent him to prison, probably not though. It was very uncommon that rapists got sent to prison, there were too many of them and in Louis' case he hadn't really said no but he hadn't said yes either. But it didn't matter, if Mark had gotten Louis pregnant then there would be a lot more talk, mainly because Mark was Louis' stepfather and twenty five years older than Louis himself. Had it been someone from Louis' old school no one would have done anything about it. They would have said that it was his own fault for being in school during his heat, even if it was his first. He should have known.

None of that mattered right now though, because Louis was in the middle of a conversation with his only friend at school; Niall. Niall was also an omega and he was fourteen, just like Louis. But he had dyed blond hair and deep bright blue eyes, his eyes reminded Louis of the sea in summer. When Niall got upset his eyes would get darker and get a stormy look, instead of the sparkling bright look he other ways had.

Louis didn't like seeing him upset. Niall was Irish and sent here a week after Louis. He had gone into his heat while being out playing with his friends, he had known he was an omega though. Or he had been pretty sure he was at least. He was small, almost as small as Louis but less curvy. He had always been more sensitive than his friends and last year the doctors had said that he most likely was an omega. His first heat was painless and his parents had taken him to the hospital where they had injected something that took the heat away immediately. After that his parents had sent him here.

Louis hadn't told Niall about how his first, and only, heat had went and Niall didn't question it, sensing that Louis didn't want to talk about it. Louis had told him though about how he had had to leave his best friend behind and how much he missed him. Niall hadn't left much behind but missed his home, he had never been popular really and he hadn't many great friends so he didn't miss them that much. Louis missed Harry a lot though but he had Niall now at least.

"What do you want to do today Lou?" Niall asked after a while and Louis shrugged. He didn't really want to do anything. He was kind of tired and his head was hurting for no real reason.

"I don't know, I have to study Geography though, we have a test on Monday, right?" Louis asked and Niall nodded, sighing deeply.

"I hate geography. I don't care where Sweden or Bratislava is, why do I need to know that? It's not like I'll move there." Louis smiled at Niall, giggling softly.

"Sweden is a great country though, they have better rights for omegas there than we have here in England."

"Whatever, our rules aren't that bad, it's only the 'What is rape' rule thing that is a bit messed up. You know the whole you have to say no for it to be a no and if you go somewhere public in heat or close to your heat it will be your own fault and that it only really matters if you get knocked up. A rape is a rape, if you ask me. I would never let an alpha dominant me, I'm me own person and they can't push me around like a toy just 'cause they're bigger." Niall said angrily, his accent thick as usually. "It is like half of the people in this school has been raped and no one gives a fuck, if you or I had been raped I would kill the person who did it."

Louis looked down and sighed, nodding at what Niall had said. If Niall had been raped Louis would be so mad. It wasn't fair and Niall out of all people should never have to go through something like it. Louis knew what it was like but his case was still not classed as a 'real' rape because he had been in heat, he didn't get knocked up and he didn't say no or struggle enough. But what could he have done? He's much smaller than Mark and Mark had used his alpha voice so Louis couldn't say against him, he had no choice than take it. And thank god he didn't get pregnant, he didn't have the strength to raise a kid and he didn't have the heart to do abortion. He couldn't have a kid when he still was one himself.

'"I know what you mean, it's all really unfair." Louis said quietly to his friend. Niall seemed truly upset over the subject, his eyes were stormy and his face was red.  
  
"I can't understand alphas who rape omegas. How can that give them pleasure? It is insane!"

"Calm down Niall, and alphas don't really think when they're aroused. They do what their body tells them too."

"You can't defend them like that, what they do is wrong!" Niall argued and Louis sighed.

"I'm not defending them, I know what they do is wrong, but it's not easy for them to go against their bodies. It's their instinct to have sex when they smell an omega in heat or go into rut. Just like we omegas wants to get fucked while we're in heat. It's just how it works and the alphas takes advantage of it." Louis declared and Niall shook his head.

"You can't possibly say you would want anyone to fuck you if you went into heat, you still do have standards. Like me brother is an alpha but I would never let him get near me if I went into me heat, I'd never let him touch me like that."

"But you can't tell him no if he uses his alpha voice." Louis murmured quietly and Niall sighed.

"I think that's where the biggest problem is, we can't tell them no and that's what they use against us. If we only could go against their alpha voices then there would be a lot less unclassified rapes."

"But the people who decides are mainly betas or alphas and they don't think it's that hard to go against their orders."

"Maybe it isn't, has anyone ever used their alpha voice to you?" Niall asked thoughtfully.

Hands and knees Mark's voice echoed through Louis' head and he swallowed thickly. He could still hear Mark say it and still feel the unbearable urge to obey. He couldn't have said no, his body wouldn't have let him to it. He had to follow the orders.

Louis nodded slowly and looked away from Niall. He didn't want Niall to know what his step dad had done but he couldn't lie to him either.

"Oh, okay, how did it feel?" Niall asked carefully and Louis frowned.

"I couldn't go against it, like, there was still urge to obey and I just could not not do as he said." Louis answered truthfully and he could see Niall nodding in the corner of his eye. Their conversation ended there, Niall could sense he got onto a sensitive subject and he didn't want to push Louis so he didn't ask more about it.

They didn't talk much more that day, choosing to study in silence and only asking each other some questions about geography every now and then. Louis was glad Niall had dropped the subject about rape and omegas rights. It was not that Louis didn't care or think about those things, it was things he could relate very well too but he was not comfortable with talking about it. He didn't want to think too much about it, if he did he was sure he would go crazy. He wanted to leave that part of his life in the past.

So what, his first heat hadn't ended well and his step father had raped him, he couldn't let that ruin his entire life. It was in the past and that was where it would stay. He didn't need to talk about it.


	3. Chapter 3

***Four years later***

Louis rested his head on Niall's shoulder and sighed deeply. It was their las night at the institution. Louis was eighteen now and Niall would be in a month. They had both been fourteen when they found out they were omegas but Niall had just turned and Louis was on the verge of turning fifteen but hadn't yet. Now though they were older and had to go out and face the 'real' world. The real, cruel world that neither of them really wanted to face, but they had to. They had to start university and sure, there were a few that only were for omegas but they had to face the real world sooner or later and it wouldn't get easier if they waited three years more. They didn't think so at least.

They had been here for four years and it had been pretty much the same everyday, not much happened. They were still good friends and Louis loved and cared for Niall loads, same went for Niall's feelings for Louis. They were like best friends but Louis still didn't want to replace Harry. It had been four years since he saw him but he still thought about him every day and missed him loads, it might seem silly but Louis truly hoped they would meet again. They probably wouldn't, Louis' mum had sent a letter two years after she had left Louis at the school and told him a bit about how things were. Harry and his mum had moved to Holmes Chapel which was far away from Doncaster where they had lived before. Mark hadn't gone to jail and Jay had apologized for not visiting or writing earlier but told Louis that it was for the best that they cut the contact. Louis hadn't much to say about it but he missed his family a lot.  
  
Niall's family visited a couple of times every year and wrote to them every now and then. They had taken Louis into the family and treated him like he was one of them. Louis was very thankful and loved them as if they were his real family. They were the closest to a family he had now.

It had taken over a year before Louis told Niall about his first, and still only, heat. He had been nervous but Niall had taken it better than Louis ever could have hoped for. It had ended with both of them crying and hugging each other tightly and Niall swearing that he would protect Louis and not let anyone touch him like that ever again. Louis had giggled with tears in his eyes and on his cheeks and hugged Niall tighter. They didn't talk about it more after that, Louis didn't want to and Niall knew it. There was not much left to say about it either, nothing would change what had happened and it was in the past. Louis wanted to leave it like that.

They were going to the University of West London, Louis was going to study Fashion and Textiles while Niall would study Music Production, what they would do when they had graduated wasn't sure but Niall knew he wanted to do something with music but if it was making music or performing he wasn't sure. Louis didn't really know what he would do but he knew he liked to design things and if something would come from that then he would be happy. It would be cool to be a designer, for clothes, if you asked him.

The university was on St Marys road and they had rented a flat a few blocks away. The flat was big enough for the both of them and not too expensive. They had also searched for part time jobs they could match up with their studying. Louis had gotten a work as a waiter at a restaurant a ten minutes walk from the flat and Niall was promised to get to perform at a bar nearby every Wednesday, Thursday and Sunday evening. They wouldn't make a lot of money from it but it was enough to make a living of it.

"I will kinda miss it here." Niall whispered after they had been sitting silent for a while. Louis nodded and sighed.

"Me too but I'm excited to start university. It'll be fun, I think."

"Yea, make new friends and discover the world." Niall said thoughtfully and smiled lightly. It wouldn't be a problem for Niall to make new friends, he was that kind of person that everyone loved, he was funny, loud and just knew how to make people comfortable. Louis though wold have it harder, if you asked him, he was a bit more reserved but opened up when he felt comfortable enough. And when he finally opened up he could make anyone laugh and was very outgoing. But first he had to get to know the person which was hard when he didn't talk much, so it would be hard for him to make new friends. They hadn't had any real contact with the outside world since they got to the institution. No alphas were allowed inside and they, all the omegas, had to stay in the school district all the time except from some specific holidays, like Christmas and half a month in the summer. So they hadn't had a chance to see much of the world.

"Do you think we will be okay?" Louis asked a moment later and Niall shrugged, making Louis' head that was still resting on Niall's shoulder move a bit.

"I think so, I hope so. We'll always have each other at least." Niall was quiet for a while before talking again. "And as long as we take our suppressants no one can be entirely sure that we are omegas. We'll just pass them as small betas."

"You will at least, your personality doesn't really match the standard omega, no offence but you are more of the beta type." Louis answered, most of the omegas were quiet and withdrawn, not loud and social in the way Niall was.

"None taken but don't worry Lou, I've got your back and as long as you take your pills and don't get so horny that you leak in public it will be fine." Niall said and pulled Louis closer with the arm he had around Louis' back. Louis smiled softly at him.

"I've got yours too, as you said: we'll always have each other." Niall nodded and smiled.

"That is for sure. And I'm sure we will make more friends that will be there for us, no matter if they know if we're omegas or not."

That night they slept beside each other in Louis' bed, cuddling close and dreaming about their new life. Niall wasn't too worried, it would work out no matter what happened and he wouldn't take shit from anyone. Louis though was more worried but hoped that it would all be fine. He had a feeling it would be though, because Niall would be there with him and as said no one could know for sure he was an omega if he took his suppressants and used a scent neutralizer (and didn't get too horny in public). He could get the suppressants from a drugstore but he had to make sure no one saw him when he bought them and then he had to keep them hidden in their flat so no one accidentally found them and figured what Niall and he was. But it would be fine, it had to be.


	4. Chapter 4

Summer after their second year had just passed and he and Niall were starting their third year at the university. Their flat was quite shitty and they would love nothing more than moving out but money was tight. Niall couldn't keep performing at the bar he had when they moved in and hadn't gotten a new job. Louis had quit his job a year ago when one of his coworkers, an alpha, had cornered him in the bathroom. The alpha had gone into an unexpected rut and wasn't thinking straight, Louis was lucky though and one of the costumers had helped him out. Liam, the man who had helped him was a beta only one year younger than himself and they became quick friends. It turned out that Liam dated Zayn from Louis' classes, Louis and Zayn were pretty good friends and hung out every now and then. Zayn was also a beta and Niall loved him (in a very friendly way).

Louis had heard a lot about Liam from Zayn but never met him, but now that he had he could say that he really lived up to what Zayn had said. Liam was like a puppy, with big brown eyes and an innocent aura but he had a protective side and knew how to stand up for people.

Back to the subject, Liam had helped Louis out from getting raped and Louis was forever thankful. Liam had taken Louis home to Louis' and Niall's flat and Niall had gotten furious over the situation and demanded Louis to quit that job and never step his foot into that restaurant ever again. Louis had obeyed and Liam had gone home soon after.

The next time Louis met Liam was when Zayn was going to introduce him a week later. Liam had stared wide eyed before greeting him like an old friend. The four of them were great friends after that and hung out more often than not.

It was great and Louis and Niall had managed to stay out of problem apart from the bathroom problem. Niall had also gone into heat in April, he had forgotten to take his suppressants and Liam and Zayn had been over at Louis' and Niall's flat, eating dinner when Liam had looked confused and sniffed. He had then asked what it was that was smelling, Zayn had also noticed and then Niall had sworn loudly and stood up before running to his bedroom. Louis understood what happened and calmly told Liam and Zayn that he needed to go to the store and that he needed them to make sure no one went into the flat. They had nodded and Louis had run down to the drugstore and bought an 'emergency pill' for omegas. When he had entered Niall's room Niall was a moaning mess, with fingers buried deep inside himself and even Louis could smell the slick that was leaking on the sheets. He had handed Niall the pill and a glass of water.

Ten minutes later and Niall was back to normal, only a bit flustered and in a need of a shower. Zayn and Liam had left the flat when Louis had gotten back and Louis had told them that he would take care of it. They had looked a bit worried and confused but nodded and left. From what Louis knew Niall had never told them he was an omega so they probably had thought he was a beta up until then, Louis though they knew was an omega since Liam had helped him away from that alpha.

Back to the present and it was the first day back from Summer break and the first day of Louis' third and last year at university, he was quite excited to be honest. He had been feeling great the last week and had been waiting for this day to come, he usually wasn't excited for school but he had a good feeling about this year.

The halls were crowded when he arrived, new students that didn't know where to go and others trying to get to their class on time. Louis had over slept a bit this morning and to put it quite frankly he had forgotten to go to the bathroom. Niall was starting later than Louis and had occupied their small bathroom so Louis had left without using it and he needed to go now.

He quickly did his business when he had reached it and locked the stall behind him. He walked out to wash his hands when he bumped in to someone.

"Oops." he said and looked up at the boy he had walked in to. The lad was taller than him and had curly brown hair. It was something about him that Louis recognized, he had seen those shocking green eyes before.

"Hi." the boy said and smiled, showing of his dimples. Louis was sure he had seen that smile before. "I'm Harry."

It clicked then, those eyes and that smile, it had to be him. No one looked like that and was named Harry if it wasn't The Harry. Louis stared at him with his mouth wide open, probably looking like a fool. Last time he had seen Harry, Harry had been eleven with straight hair, only a bit of a hint of curls. And Harry had never been this big, not fat no no, just big. Tall with broad shoulders and legs that seemed never ending.

"I'm..I'm Louis." Louis said after an awkward silence where he had been staring intensely at Harry who seemed to have no clue who Louis was. But as Louis said his own name Harry's eyes flashed with recognition.

"Louis?" Harry repeated with eyes wide open. Louis nodded and smiled shyly.  
"Hi Haz, long time no see." he said, using Harry's old pet name he had come up with when he was ten.

"Louis you idiot! I never thought I would see you again!" Harry was smiling big, although he had just called Louis an idiot. He seemed like he wasn't really believing it, Louis felt the same. What were the odds that he would meet his childhood best friend after not seeing him for almost seven years. It was insane. Louis was suddenly pulled into a tight hug, his head pressed against Harry's hard chest. Louis smiled and hugged him back.

"Oh god, I've missed you so much." he murmured.

"I've missed you too Lou." Harry whispered and let go of Louis with an amused smile. "It must be faith that we would meet again. I have been wishing that we would ever since you left, which you have to explain later."

"You don't know? Didn't my mum tell you or your mum?" Louis asked and Harry shook his head.

"No, she cut the contact with mum when you left and we moved from Doncaster about a month later. Mum had planned our move for a long time but didn't tell me until she had to because she knew I wouldn't want to leave you. I still didn't want to leave when you had because I was sure you would be coming back but mum said you wouldn't.   
Where did you even go?"

"I eh, I'll tell you later, here give me your number." Louis handed him his phone and Harry quickly saved his number into Louis' phone before handing it back. "I'll call you later but I have to run to class, it's really good to see you again."

Louis was almost out the door when Harry called his name.

"It's good seeing you too, I've really missed you." Louis smiled and hugged Harry quickly before leaving the bathroom and hurrying to class, getting spot on time.

***  
Louis didn't run into Harry more during school that day but when his last class ended he called him just as Niall was walking up to him with a big smile. Louis waved at him with the hand he wasn't holding the phone in and almost jumped when he heard Harry's voice through the phone speaker.

"Hello?" his voice sounded darker through the phone and Louis held back a shudder.

"Hi, eh it's Louis." he said and tried to hold his smile somewhat normal so Niall wouldn't wonder.

"Oh hi! I was just thinking you had forgotten me."

"I would never but maybe we could go and grab some tea or something, I know a great cafe not too far away that has an amazing chocolate muffin."

"Sounds great, can we meet outside the university and we'll go there together?"

"Yea of course, see you in a bit."

"Bye Lou" he hung up. Louis smiled at his phone before putting it in his pocket. Niall stood in front of him with a raised eyebrow in question.

"And who was that?" Niall asked and crossed his arms but smiling, loving to see Louis so happy, it wasn't often that Louis smiled this honestly.

"You remember Harry? My childhood friend? I bumped in to him, literally, today and we're going to a cafe to catch up and so." Louis answered with a big smile and a small, unaccountable blush spreading on his cheeks.

"Oh my god Louis, that is great! Do you um know if he's a...do you know what kind he is?" Niall asked, referring on if Harry was a beta, omega or alpha. Louis shook his head.

"I'm not sure, but he's not an omega that is for sure. He's way too big for that but I know Haz, Niall so you don't have to worry even if he turns out to be an alpha." Louis said confidently.

"You don't know that Louis, you don't know him anymore Lou, it has been like what? Seven years since you met him, he can have changed." Niall said hating how Louis smile turned into a frown.

"Well there is only one way to find out that now is there. I'll hang out in public with him Niall it's not like he'll rape me in the cafe." Louis hissed and glared at Niall.

"I don't think you should go alone with him, I don't want you to get hurt again." Niall whispered and Louis sighed deeply.

"Niall you can't protect me from everything, Harry doesn't even know I'm an omega yet and I'm not planning on telling him but I won't lie to him either . If he asks, I'll tell him just please relax and let me do this alone." Louis whispered angrily.

"He doesn't know?" Niall asked slowly, like he was trying to progress the fact. Louis nodded.

"Mum didn't tell him or Harry's mum so he has no idea why I left." Louis said and Niall nodded.

"Okay, sure. Go then you don't want to be late for you date." Niall winked and smirked. Louis snorted and shook his head before walking out. Harry was already waiting when Louis got out. They were quiet on the walk to the cafe, both of them caught up in their own minds and thoughts, trying to think of where to start the conversation. They ordered when they arrived and sat down by a small table in a corner.

"Okay so um, how are you?" Harry asked when the waiter had given them their orders. Louis smiled and shrugged.

"Alright I guess, what about you? And what are you studying?" Louis asked and Harry smiled.

"I'm good and I'm studying photography, you?"

"Design and textile." Louis answered.

"So um, could you tell me why you left? It has been bugging me for so long now."   
Harry said, changing the topic. Louis sighed and looked down.

"I eh, something big kinda happened and I couldn't stay in Doncaster anymore, I just had to get away from there for a while and I'm really sorry for not saying goodbye or telling you where I was going but I didn't really know myself so I couldn't. I'm so sorry Haz. But my mum told you nothing?." Louis answered and Harry shook his head.

"She didn't, it's really weird really, mum thought it had something Mark to do. The whole Tomlinson family acted weird ever since you left and Jay never talked to mum anymore." Louis held back a cringe at his step dad's name, it was long since he heard someone say it and only the name made memories flash through Louis' mind.

Louis nodded and sighed "I haven't talked to mum for years, I don't even know if my sisters miss me. But seriously Haz, I'm so sorry for leaving like that."

"It's okay I guess, it wasn't your fault." Harry smiled lightly and Louis felt bad for ever leaving Harry, he couldn't even imagine how hurt and confused Harry must have felt when Louis didn't show up the morning after so they could walk to school together. But he couldn't have stayed with his family and Mark, he had had to leave.

"So um, what's new? Was Holmes Chapel nice?" Louis asked, changing the subject.

"It was alright, I didn't really get any great friends and I missed you. I um found out I was an alpha when I was seventeen, so I was quite a late bloomer I guess. Mum and I had thought I would be a beta but yea." Harry shrugged like it wasn't a big deal and Louis' heart hammered in his chest. Harry was an alpha, it wasn't a big surprise, even as a kid Harry had been overprotective and outgoing. But he had been quite small for his age but things change. Louis thou had always been small and would always be, he had been pretty loud and outgoing when he was younger but grew out of it.

"Oh that's cool, but you're on like suppressants and so now then?" Louis asked and Harry nodded. Louis let out a breath in relief, feeling his shoulders relax as he heard Harry continue talking.

"Yep, don't want to go into a random rut and do something I'll regret and risk hurting someone, I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I did." Harry said honestly and Louis smiled.

"That's good of you. It's not many alphas who think like that." Louis said and Harry shrugged.

"They should, they could ruin someones life if they don't. What about you, when did you find out what you were?" Harry asked curiously and Louis sighed. He hated lying to Harry, he wasn't going to, he had already left Harry in the dark once, he wasn't going to lie. He took a deep breath and looked down.

"Right before I left Doncaster I found out I was an omega." he shrugged and sighed as he faked a smile and if he didn't mistake himself he saw a flash of understanding cross Harry's face, as if he had been expecting Louis to say this.

"That's cool, mum always said you'd probably be one." Harry said and smiled. Louis smiled back softly and shrugged.

"Quite obvious I guess."

"A bit, but some might think you're a small beta. But you're taking suppressants and scent neutralizer, right?" Harry asked and Louis nodded slowly.

"Yup, wouldn't dare to go outside otherwise." Louis answered and smiled slightly. If he knew that someone could smell that he was an omega he would never go out, he had panicked after Niall's surprise heat because the entire flat smelled omega and Louis had sprayed an entire bottle of scent neutralizer afterwards and washed the bedsheets twice.

"I can usually tell when someone's an omega but the only reason anyone would think you were one is because you're tiny but you don't give away any scent at all, which is good I guess." Harry said reassuringly and Louis smiled lightly.

"I do my best to hide it, you, Niall, Liam and Zayn are the only ones that know. Liam found out and told Zayn but Niall and I went to the same school earlier so he knew." Louis said and Harry nodded.

"And they're your friends?"

"Yes"

"Is eh any of them alphas?" Harry asked worriedly and Louis shook his head.

"Nope, Niall and I are in the same boat and Liam and Zayn are betas, in a relationship with one other." Louis said and Harry smiled.

"Cool, and you're not um mated?" he asked and Louis blushed slightly, most omegas in his age had already found a partner and mated but the only one Louis had been with like that was his step dad. And that didn't even count if you asked Louis.

"No um no, are you?" Louis asked slowly and Harry smiled.

"Nope, haven't found the one yet." he winked at Louis and Louis almost choked on his tea and giggled while shaking his head. Was Harry flirting with him? His best friend, the innocent boy he befriended back in kindergarten.

"I um okay."

Harry laughed and smiled big, his dimples showing off and making Louis feel as if they were ten and seven again and not having any bigger worries than who that would reach the tree house first.

He was really glad he found Harry again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know when next update will be, I have a lot to do in school right now. xx


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IMPORTANT! I've changed a couple of things in the last chapter, the only really improtant thing I changed was that Louis did tell Harry that he was an omega. Also I'm very sorry for the long wait, I have a lot to do in school and my best friend's dad took his life last weekend so I've spent a lot time with her. Alright now you can continue reading.

Niall wasn't too happy when he finally met Harry. Louis had of course told him that Harry was an alpha when he got home after his and Harry's coffee date. Niall had tried to make Louis think it over ("Do you really think it's a good idea to be friends with an alpha? What if something goes wrong?" Niall asked. "He's my best friend Niall, he would never hurt me." "But he's an _alpha_. Alphas doesn't always think or control what they do, even if they're your best friends." "I know Niall but I really want Harry back in my life. You know how much I've missed him" "But Lou, what if you get hurt?" Louis had sighed then and shrugged "Then that's it and I wont ever talk to him again, but what if I don't get hurt? I can't just stop living just because something might happen." both of them got silent for a while before Niall nodded "Okay fine but if he tries anything you don't want then you'll make him leave." "Of course" "Good") They hadn't talked more about it after that but now Harry was in their flat, helping Louis to prepare dinner while Niall was watching him skeptically.

"So Harry, you're an alpha." Niall stated and Harry smiled and nodded.

"Yes I am."

"But you take suppressants daily and is in no risk of going into rut?"

Harry had smiled lightly at that before answering.

"I take my pills every second month for two week straight to prevent myself from going into rut, yes. I have got my instructions by a doctor so there is no need to worry."

"As long as no one of us go into heat." Niall said and glared slightly at Harry, thinking back to what could have happened if Harry had been there when he went into heat back in April.

"Yea but you guys take your pills daily though right?" Harry asked with a soft smile, clearly not too bothered by Niall's glares.

"Yes." Niall snapped and Louis groaned at him.

"Stop being such a bitch Niall, Harry takes his suppressants as he should and so do we. As long as we all keep doing that we have nothing to worry about." Louis said and Niall crossed his arms.

"And if he forgets? Or we forget?"

"Niall if you think like that you could never leave this house because what if someone else forgot to take their pills? Anything can happen Niall." Niall sighed deeply but nodded.

"Alright fine. Have you ever been in rut?" Niall asked Harry who blushed slightly.

"Eh twice but um my mum locked my bedroom door from the outside the first time and took me to the doctors when it was over and the second time was when my doctor changed my medicine and it didn't work as it should. But we had like those injections that takes it away immediately which I still have in my flat if something happens." Harry answered slowly while looking nervous. Niall raised an eyebrow.

"So you've never fucked anyone while you've been in rut?"

"Well eh no, I um actually never really um fucked anyone ever." Harry admitted while blushing deeply. 

"So you're a virgin?" Niall asked and Harry nodded shamefully.

"Haven't found anyone I've wanted like that." Harry answered and Louis suddenly felt very jealous of both Niall and Harry. Both of them had their innocence left, they were both pure and clean. Louis wasn't clean, he had been touched, he had had someone inside him, someone he hadn't even wanted. He hadn't gotten a chance to save his virginity or choose who he wanted to give it to. He had gotten it taken from him and he would never get it back.

It wasn't fair at all and Louis was mad. He wanted to have a say in everything that happened with him, he didn't want to be toyed around by people who stood above him. He didn't want to be treated like a sex doll just because he was an omega. He was still a person with human rights and no one should be able to take that from him.

He didn't realize he was gripping the sink tightly and glaring at the wall until he met Niall and Harry's worried gazes. Louis let out a long breath to calm himself before going back to cutting cucumber.

"Are you alright?" Niall asked quietly when Harry had excused himself for the bathroom, probably sensing that the two omegas needed to talk. 

"It's not fair Niall." he murmured and glared at his friend. Niall took a step closer and placed a hand on Louis' shoulder.

"What isn't?" Niall asked and Louis sighed deeply. He hated talking about things like this but he knew he couldn't get away without talking now after spacing out like he had.

"Everything. I want to be able to choose too." he whispered feeling the anger fade from him and getting replaced with hopelessness. He could never change what had happened and it would probably happen similar things many more times in his life.

That was just included with being an omega, rapes and rape attempts were a part of omegas lives. He just had to accept that, there was no way he could change it, he would never have the upper hand or a say in anything. He had to be submissive and take everything that was thrown at him and do everything he was asked to do. He wasn't his own person, he would always be owned by someone else, someone would always have a say in everything he did.

"What do you want to choose? You can do anything you want Louis." Niall said cluelessly and Louis shook his head.

"No I can't. I can't choose, I've gotten that right stolen from me, I'll never be able to choose. Someone else will always have the upper hand."

"Is this..is it about the whole Harry is a virgin and waiting for the right person?" Niall asked and Louis nodded shamefully. He didn't want to be jealous over something like that but he couldn't help it, his virginity was something he would never get back or be able to have a say in, it was already gone. "Louis, you will find the right person and maybe you wont be able to give him your virginity but you can give him so much more."

Louis sighed but nodded in agreement. Harry came back to the kitchen and smiled lightly at them.

The rest of the night was less tense than it had been when Harry first arrived. Niall was more easy going with Harry but there was still a bit of hesitation in everything they did. They all pretended that Louis' little freak out in the kitchen never happened and Louis was thankful, he didn't want to explain it to Harry. He didn't even really understand it himself but there was a rage burning in his heart, screaming at him to break free from the omega role. Be his own person and not give a fuck about what everyone else thought. He wanted to fuck with whoever he wanted and not have to worry about being called a slut or getting raped in an allay. He wanted to be able to go outside without worrying that someone might be able to tell that he was an omega. He wanted to be free to do whatever the fuck he wanted. He wanted to fall in love and he wanted to have a healthy relationship with a man he loved and who loved him back just as much, someone who would listen to him and care about what Louis thought and felt. Someone who wouldn't treat him like an omega but a person.

 An individual.

All he ever really wanted was to be able to have a say in his life.


	6. Chapter 6

He had to get mated. Louis was twenty now, soon twenty one and most omegas in his age were mated by now. Niall was a year younger and he had started seeing an alpha recently. The alpha was called Oliver and Louis had not liked him at all when he first saw him, the guy had lots of tattoos and ripped jeans, a typical bad boy but Louis had to admit that he had a calm voice and kind eyes. Oli was quite nice but Louis still didn't like him all that much but Niall was head over heels for him and it was obvious that Oli felt the same for Niall. Louis was of course happy for his friend but he was a bit jealous too, but can you really blame him? He was a year older than Niall and still hadn't had any romantic interest.

Harry had been around a lot since they met first day in school and Louis liked him loads, as a friend. Harry was wonderful and cared a lot for Louis but Louis was pretty sure he was straight. Louis had seen the way Harry looked at girls when they walked by and no gay guy looked at girls like that. There could have been a chance Louis would have fallen for Harry if he knew he was interested, but Louis didn't want to waste his time. Harry would never want him like that, especially not if he found out that Louis wasn't pure. Harry had kind of flirted with Louis but it was just a friendly banter probably.

Harry would have been a good mate though, he was gentle for being an alpha and he cared a lot. Louis could totally picture them growing old together but it was no use. He should just get over it and find someone who wanted to mate with him.

"Loooouuuiiiis?" Harry asked and Louis snapped out of his thoughts. They were sitting in the library, studying for upcoming tests.

"What?" Louis asked and sighed.

"I was asking you if you were free on Friday?" Harry said slowly and smiled lightly.

"Hm I think so, why?"

"I thought that we could have a movie night or something." Harry said and sure Louis would totally like that, it sounded nice but he couldn't just sit inside if he wanted to find someone.

"Or we could go to a club?" Louis suggested and Harry looked at him doubtfully.

"Niall wouldn't like if I did that." he said and Louis rolled his eyes.

"Niall doesn't need to know, he's busy with Oli and I think they were planning on staying at our place this weekend and I'd rather not be there. Who knows what they'll be up to." Louis knew that Niall and Oli had fucked, Niall had told him and been so happy, they hadn't knotted or mated but Oli had gotten to be Niall's first. But who knew, maybe they would soon, it wouldn't surprise him.

"Why do you want to go to a club? I never really pictured you as that kind of guy?" Harry asked in his slow voice and Louis couldn't help but glare at him because of his words.

" _That kind of guy?_ And what would that mean? Not the kind of guy who has one night stands or who whores around?" Louis snapped and Harry looked at him with calm eyes which made Louis calm a bit too. He wasn't being fair, he knew Harry didn't mean anything bad with his words.

"No, actually you're right, I thought that you would like to have your first time a bit more special." that made Louis snap, he stood up from the table they had occupied. He would have done anything to have his first time more special but that didn't matter, his first time had already been. Harry's once calm eyes were now filled with confusion and he looked at Louis like he was thinking of saying something. Louis grabbed his own bag and smiled falsely.

"And who says I haven't had my first time yet?" he asked sarcastically and he saw Harry frown.

"You told me you hadn't mated." Harry said slowly as if nothing made sense and Louis shook his head.

"I haven't but that doesn't mean I haven't done anything." Mark hadn't mated him, he had knotted Louis but never bitten down on his neck and left an unbreakable bond, he had had some mercy at least. If Mark had mated Louis then there would have been no way Louis could have left, he always had to be with his mate. But his mum and Mark had soul bonded so Mark couldn't have bonded Louis too. There was only one mate for every omega and alpha.

"I just thought, I mean, you were at an all omega school since you were fourteen to nineteen so I just didn't think you had had the time to, like, find someone." Harry explained and Louis sighed deeply.

"Look, it doesn't even matter. We can stay and watch a movie at your flat if you'd rather do that, it's no problem." Louis said and Harry shook his head.

"It does matter, you're my best friend. I want to know who your first time was with, I mean it has to be someone pretty special if he got you." it was meant as a compliment, Louis understood that but he couldn't take it as one. He had lost his virginity to his step dad, it was not his choice and it hadn't felt special. Louis hadn't enjoyed it and he didn't want to think about it more. He was tired of having to live with that in mind, he didn't want to remember what Mark had done and right now he felt so mad. He wasn't even that mad at Harry, Harry didn't know better, but Louis was mad at Mark, at what he had done and how he made Louis feel.

"I was fourteen and it was with Mark." Louis didn't know why he said it but as soon as the words left his lips he started walking towards the exit quickly, feeling angry tears well up in his eyes. He didn't look back to see how Harry's eyes changed from confused to understanding and he didn't listen as Harry called out his name and asked him to come back. Louis kept walking and when he got home he slammed the door shut and walked into his room, ignoring Niall's chipper greeting and laid down on the bed. Then he did something he rarely ever did, he cried. Not small sniffles and small tears but loud heart wrenching sobs. Niall rushed into the bedroom and started stroking Louis' back slowly, trying to calm him down but Louis cried louder. He could still remember how his mum had stroked his back gently right after they had gotten Mark out of the room, he could still recall the faces of everyone he had seen that day. The three male nurses who had been in his room with his mum, the lady who helped him in the ambulance, the other two female nurses he met at the hospital and a young boy who was a couple of years older than himself that had the bed beside his own in the hospital. He hadn't gotten his own room, he had shared it with an other boy, a ginger haired boy with freckles and big blue eyes. Louis never got to know the boy's name or why he was there.

"What happened Louis?" Niall whispered and Louis took a couple of breathes between his sobs.

"I told Harry." he murmured into the pillow. He hid his face in shame, he hated feeling weak and crying always made him feel weak and pathetic, he didn't want Niall to see him like this. Didn't want him to know how vulnerable Louis really was. He felt stupid for being this upset just 'cause he told his best friend about something that happened almost seven years ago.

"You told him? How did he react?" Niall asked and Louis shook his head and hid a sad smile, he was so pathetic.

"I don't know, I left before I could find out." he whispered and he heard Niall sigh, he was probably thinking Louis was pathetic too. Pathetic for being too afraid to face the reaction of his best friend. Always so weak, such a typical omega, the only thing he'd ever be good at would be playing the submissive part in the relationship. Never able to stand up for himself, always running from his problems and crying about them. Louis hated himself at that moment, it felt as if everything that had ever gone wrong in his life came crashing right there, it wasn't even about what he had told Harry anymore; it was everything. From the first time he had gotten teased by his friends for being small, to the day Mark raped him, to how he never got good grades, how his mum cut the contact, to how the man at the restaurant had cornered him, to how he had told Harry just moments ago. He had always felt bad about these stuff but he had kept it inside and it was as if the dam broke and everything came crashing.

He didn't want this anymore. He didn't want to be an omega. He didn't want to have gotten raped. He didn't want anything. He just wanted to be normal. He wanted to feel alright.

He didn't notice how Niall had pulled him into a hug but all Louis knew was that right now, at this moment he wasn't okay but at least he had Niall. As they had promised when they had left their old school, they would always have each other.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So sorry for the late update, I've been really busy in school and haven't had any insperation to write. My best friend is also going through something really hard and I've tried to spend a lot time with her. Well enough of explnations, hope you liked the chapter, please tell me what you think. x


	7. Chapter 7

The next morning Louis woke up alone in his bed, the smell of pancakes filling the flat. It confused Louis slightly because as far as he knew Niall was just as bad as Louis himself was at cooking. The pancakes smelled good though and Louis was tempted to get out of bed to taste some of them. 

It was quite in the house, only the low sound of the radio playing some slow tune in from the kitchen, it was some rocky tune and it made Louis feel somewhat calm, even though he was alone in bed he knew there was others in the house and that made him feel safe and calm somehow.

He yawned loudly and sat up slowly, he could now hear Niall laughing from an other room followed by someone talking, Louis was still tired and couldn't really place the voice. He unlocked his phone and rolled his eyes at the twenty missed calls and seven messages Harry had left. Louis didn't want to talk with Harry right now, he didn't need to right now. But he did feel as if he owed it to Harry to at least read the messages.

**From Harry: _Please Louis pick up_**

**From Harry: _I had no idea it was Mark please Louis Im so sorry_**

**From Harry** _**: Talk to me Louis please** _

**From Harry: _Im sorry_**

**From Harry: _Louis Im worried please pick up x_**

**From Harry _: We can work this out please call me xx_**

**From Harry:** _**I cant lose you again please Lou** _

Louis was slightly tearing up by the last message but shook his his head to himself and laughed sadly. He didn't want to lose Harry either and it was not like he would cut Harry out of his life because of this. Harry would have found out sooner or later and as Harry said, he didn't know it was Mark who had done it. Harry had nothing to be sorry for, Louis was the one who had fucked up; as always. 

**To Harry: _Dont be sorry its not ur fault. Lunch today?_**

Louis thought about adding a 'x' to the end as Harry had done on some of the other messages but decided against it, sending a 'x' felt like taking their friendship to an other level. It was not that Louis didn't want to take it a step further, he just didn't want to get his hopes up. People like Harry didn't like Louis like that and Louis shouldn't even try that path; it would only end badly. He would rather have Harry as a friend and not as a boyfriend for a week and then as a stranger. He would lose Harry if they ever tried dating, he was sure of that.

The door to his bedroom opened and Niall poked his head in and smiled lightly when he saw that Louis was awake.

"Morning hun, Oli and I made pancakes, mind joining us?" Niall asked softly and Louis stood up.

"I'll be out in a minute, let me just get dressed." Niall nodded and smiled and closed the door again. Louis ran a hand through his hair and sighed, Niall had gotten so much softer and omega-like ever since he started dating Oli. He didn't think Niall noticed it himself but Louis noticed. It was common though, that omegas took their omega role when they had an alpha. Louis didn't really like the change, he loved the loud and confident Niall but he also liked this Niall, he was still Niall after all and he acted as his old self when Oli wasn't around. It wasn't even a drastic change.

Louis changed from the clothes he had worn yesterday and fallen asleep in to a clean dark red t-shirt and a pair of skinny black jeans. He didn't bother fixing his hair, it wasn't like he had to impress Oli and Niall had seen him at his worst (or almost worst; Louis' worst must have been the night Mark had raped him). 

Oli was speaking silently with Niall when Louis entered the kitchen. Oli was wearing a slight oversized dark gray jumper with the arms rolled up and a pair of black ripped jeans. The tattoos on his neck and arms on full display, Louis had to admit that Oli was good looking for his twenty eight years, he looked more as if he was twenty three. It was quite an age gap between Oli and Niall but that was not unusual and Louis knew that Oli treated Niall good so he didn't worry about that. Oli smiled at Louis and nodded, Louis gave him a nod back and they all sat down by the small table. Oli and Niall had done a lot of pancakes, Louis noted as he saw the plate on the middle o the table. 

"We might have done four times more than the recept said but I was hungry." Niall explained when he saw Louis looking.

"And they're vegan made." Oli added and Louis nodded slowly, he remembered now Oli was vegan. Louis wondered slightly what he had put in the pancakes if he didn't use milk or eggs, both of them were pretty much the meal's most important ingredients. Louis didn't question it though, only smiling and taking a bite. It wasn't much of a difference from non vegan pancakes, if Oli hadn't mentioned it Louis wouldn't have noticed it.

"They're really good." Louis complimented and Oli smiled lightly at him and said a silent thank you. That was something Louis had noticed too, Oli was quiet for an alpha and he never seemed truly happy; his smiles were always small and Louis wasn't sure if he had ever heard Oli laugh. Maybe Oli was an unhappy person.

They ate in silence, something Louis wasn't really used to. Niall usually talked a lot while they were eating, often talking with his mouth full of food making Louis unsure if he should laugh or cringe. Louis could see that Oli and Niall were holding hands under the table and it made Louis' heart feel warm, he was very happy for Niall.

When they had finished Louis was sure Niall had eaten half of the pancakes they had made, there was still many left but the three boys were full and Louis was sure if he ate one more he would explode or throw up. 

Louis checked his phone and noticed he had a new message from Harry.

**From Harry:** _**Yea that would be great Ill pick u up at 2? X** _

Louis smiled softly at the text and tried to ignore the 'x' at the end, it didn't mean anything Harry probably sent 'x's to everyone.

**To Harry: _Sound great see u later_**

Louis checked the time, seeing it was only a quarter after eleven, he had loads of time to get ready. He stood up.

"Thank you for the breakfast, I'll take a shower." he said and both Oli and Niall smiled at him.

"You're welcome." Oli said and Louis gave them a smile before walking back to his room. He did look back before closing the door after him and he caught sight of the pair kissing each other lovingly. Oli may pass by as a bad boy who plays with hearts and doesn't give a damn but Louis could see that none of that was true. Oli was a sweetheart with a tough cell, he gave an impression of being bad ass but he was honestly one of the sweetest alphas Louis had met, besides Harry.

Louis was happy Niall and Oli found each other, he only hoped he could find someone that treated him as good as Oli treated Niall. It was all he wanted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this chapter sucks but I felt like I had to update and I have no insperation. Hopefully next chapter will be better. If you want to know how Oli looks, then just google Oli Sykes, he's the lead singer in Bring Me The Horizon (and I may or may not have a crush on him oops) The title for the story is also from one of their songs (Hospital for souls).


	8. Chapter 8

Harry was nervous as he stood outside Louis' flat. He hadn't knocked yet, being five minutes early and not ready. He shouldn't be nervous, Louis had said that it was alright. But was it though? It had been years since Mark did what he had but Harry didn't think that was something Louis would ever be really over. Things like that were the things that would follow you through your entire life and Harry felt so stupid for not realizing earlier. His mum had implied that it was something Mark had done to make Louis leave and she had also mentioned that she thought Louis was an omega, Harry should have put the pieces together. It wasn't that hard to figure what had happened.

He shouldn't have pushed Louis to tell him the truth either, he should have dropped it when Louis said it didn't matter. He was a bit mad at himself for pushing him to tell but he hadn't known and there was nothing that he could do about it now. 

Harry was also a bit nervous about how he should act; would they keep up as before or should he do anything different? Should he ask Louis how he was and be extra careful? Or just act as if it hadn't happened? He didn't know but it wasn't like Louis had changed overnight. He shouldn't act any different but he didn't want to ignore the fact. He wanted to be there for Louis if Louis wanted to talk but he didn't want to push him into talking. It was unsettling for Harry to not know how to act, he was usually the one in charge and knew exactly what to do. This time though he was pretty clueless.

He glanced at him clock before taking a deep breath and knocking at the door. The guy who opened was heavily tattooed and it took a moment for Harry to realize it was Oli. Oliver and Harry hadn't officially met before, Harry had only seen pictures of the alpha before that Niall had showed him. The lad was about the same height as Harry and he looked at Harry slightly confused.

"Who are you?" Oli asked, voice low and full of a deep accent, not the normal London english.

"Oh ehm I'm Harry. I'm here to pick Louis up for lunch." he said and the other alpha inspected him before nodding shortly and letting him in. Harry had been there many times and knew his way around, he could see the closed door to Louis' bedroom. Harry never thought Louis or Niall smelt much like omegas usually did, which Louis had explained with the scent neutralizer, but their flat held a sweet smell that Harry couldn't explain in any way. The smell always made his head a bit clearer and he was more alert whenever he smelt it. He liked it.

"Uhm I'll go and tell Louis that you're here." Oli mumbled and Harry hadn't even realized that the other lad had been right beside him. Harry gave him a short nod and watched him walk over to Louis' door and knock at it softly before mumbling something again. Harry didn't hear him but a few moments later Louis walked out, wearing a pair of black jeans and a light blue sweater. Niall came out behind him and whispered something to Louis who nodded in return before walking over to Harry. 

Harry smiled softly at Louis feeling himself calm down as the omega came up infront of him.

"Hi." he whispered and Louis smiled.

"Hey, have you decided any place we can go?" Louis asked and Harry shrugged.

"I was thinking about the one down the street, uhm we ate there like two weeks ago i think." Harry explained and Louis nodded.

"Yea, that's a good one,"

They both said good bye to the pair and then walked out. The walk to the restaurant was short and spent in silence. Louis was quite thankful for the silence since he didn't really have anything to say and he was just happy to have Harry beside him. The silence was a bit awkward though but Louis had expected it. This wasn't only hard on himself, Louis knew, it must be hard for Harry too. Harry hadn't known and to know that his best friend had been raped must be weird to know, it wasn't an uncommon thing but Louis guessed it felt surreal. It had at least felt like that for himself, rape was something that happened all the time but it wasn't happening to himself. It was a subject every one knew about but no one ever really touched. Just like death, people died all the time but you never thought it would happen to anyone you knew.

They ordered their food when they sat down and Louis looked down on his lap. He didn't want to meet Harry's gaze he could feel on him. 

"So like, I'm eh sorry about yesterday, I didn't um know and yea I'm just really sorry." Harry said slowly and Louis thought in wonder that this was the most nervous he had ever heard Harry. Harry always seemed so sure about everything and there was never any hesitation in the things he did, he always knew what to do and say. Typical alpha behavior, this though was a new side of Harry for Louis. 

"It's alright, it was ages ago and as said; you didn't know." Louis said and shook his head. 

"I..okay. That's why you left then all those years ago, 'cause he um you know..." Harry trailed off and Louis smiled slightly, he didn't know why no one ever said the rape word. It was if they were afraid that saying it would make it all much more real.

"Yea um I went into heat in school so I had to go home and then Mark got home and yea. I'm just lucky I didn't get pregnant." he said and Harry frowned. 

"I guess." Harry said simply and Louis shrugged. Lucky maybe wasn't the right word but there was nothing right with the situation so it didn't matter.

They talked some more when their food had arrived and then walked back to Louis' flat in silence.

"I'll see you in school?" Harry asked and Louis nodded.

"Of course, thank you for today." they shared a quick hug which left Louis wanting more. He didn't feel like letting Harry walk away so he sighed and bit his lip before talking.

"Would you like to come in? I think Niall and Oli has gone over to Oli's place for the night." 

"Yea sure." Harry's face lit up with a smile and Louis felt a smile creep its way up on his own face too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry this chapter is short and sucked. I've just been really uninspired and busy with school. My grades are set today and I've had a lot of school work. On a happier note I'm seeing One Direction and Five Second Of Summer on friday and I'm so excited! I don't know when next update will be but hopefully it wont be too long from now. x


	9. Chapter 9

They spent the night watching Breaking bad and laughing at stupid jokes they told each other. When the clock neared two in the morning they were both laying on the couch, Louis with his head on Harry's chest and Harry with a protecting arm around Louis' back. They had both been silent for a few minutes now, Louis listening to the regular beats of Harry's heart. It was calming to hear his heartbeat, it made him feel loved in some way. Harry was there right with him and the arm that was wrapped around him made him feel as if Harry never wanted to let go. It all made Louis feel safe and as if he would never be alone. That Harry would be with him no matter what.

  
Louis sighed softly and he could feel Harry sigh too.

  
"You're a great friend, you know, I'm so glad that we met again." Louis mumbled into Harry's shirt and the arm around him tightened.

  
"Same goes for you, I love you Lou." Harry whispered and Louis took a sharp intake of air as he heard the three last words.

  
"Love you too Haz." he whispered after a while and he felt Harry sigh again, this time it sounded as if he was frustrated.

  
"You don't understand though." Harry mumbled and started to sit up, Louis followed quickly and sat up so he could face the alpha. Harry was looking at him with something Louis would call a pleading look, he didn't understand. Harry said he loved him, but that was as a friend, right? Just a friendly I love you, they used to tell each other they loved the other all the time when they were younger. There was no way Harry _loved_ him as being _in love_ with him. Harry could do so much better and Louis wasn't clean. Most alphas wanted their omegas clean and pure which was something Louis would never be again. Most of the alphas wanted a younger omega too. Louis could never be a good omega to Harry, though Harry would be a great alpha to any omega. Louis didn't deserve him.

  
Louis shook his head at Harry instead of speaking and Harry let out a frustrated sigh again.

  
"I _love_ you. I love _every_ single thing about you and I'm sure I have ever since you helped me back in kindergarten. You have always been _more_ than a best friend to me and I've never really understood it. But god Louis, I'm in love with you and I've been thinking a lot about that ever since you left when I was eleven. It really hit me when I was seventeen and found out I was an alpha. Everything just fell into place and then when I saw you in the bathroom I knew for sure I would never let you go because I fucking _love_ you." Harry exclaimed and then took a deep breath and shook his head. "You know I'd never hurt you or treat you bad in any way. It doesn't even matter if you don't feel the same, as long as you're happy I'll be happy."

  
Louis sat silent and studied Harry's face, trying to find something that could tell him that he was lying. Louis had never been good at reading people but he couldn't find anything that told him Harry would lie. Harry had always been honest with him before and he didn't see why Harry would lie about this.

  
"You could do better than me, there are better omegas out there that could please you better." Louis ended up saying with his head down, Harry let out something between a sigh and growl which made Louis look up again. Harry looked slightly angry but more frustrated than anything and he shook his head wildly.

  
"I don't care if there are better omegas out there. It would still be you even if you were a beta. I would still love you, not 'cause you're an omega but because you are Louis. You are my Louis that I've known since I was two and no one can ever be better than you. You are my everything." Harry said and ran a hand through his curls. Louis opened his mouth to answer but couldn't find any way to respond. He closed his mouth again and then quickly made up his mind, he loved Harry. He did, he always had but he had never given it too much thought since he didn't think he would ever have a chance. Without any trace of hesitation he leaned over to the alpha and kissed him. Harry seemed to be caught of guard but recovered from the surprise quickly and kissed the smaller lad back. The kiss was nothing but sweet and only involved lips, it was innocent and Louis wondered briefly if he was Harry's first kiss, Harry was his at least. That was something Mark hadn't taken from him, his first kiss. Louis smiled softly against Harry's lips and pulled away.

  
"I _love_ you too Hazza, I always have." he whispered and Harry smiled and pecked his lips.

  
"Does this mean you'll give me a chance?" Harry's eyes were hopefull and he looked young and innocent all of sudden. It made Louis remember that Harry was, after all only eighteen.

  
"Yea of course." Louis whispered and they shared an other sweet kiss.

  
"So you'll be my boyfriend?" Harry asked and Louis giggled and kissed his again, mumbling a yes against his boyfriend's lips.

  
They both fell asleep within an hour, having gone back to their previous position with Louis' head on Harry's chest. The next morning they both had to go to school and Harry used the shower while Louis got changed, they were both blushing and sharing soft kisses. It was a weird feeling, Louis thought, the happiness that now had been open for him. He had been happy before, he swear he was but this was different. This kind of happiness made his head dizzy, stomach full with butterflies and made him feel warm. He couldn't stop smiling and whenever he looked at Harry he was smiling too so Louis guessed the feeling was mutual. It hit him as he watched Harry while they walked the short way to the uni that the happiness he felt was love. This was what it felt like to be in love and to be honest; it was the best feeling in the whole wide world.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is so short, but at least you got some Larry action in it. My updates wont get better during this summer, if anything they'll get worse. Next week I wont be able to update at all and from the 16th of July to the 5th of August I'll be in Oxford and not able to update. Well either way I hope you liked this chapter, please comment and leave kudus :)x


	10. Chapter 10

Before Louis even got the chance to tell Niall about him and Harry Niall told him he knew. Louis stared at him with his mouth opened and asked him how he knew. Niall had only smirked and told him he smelt more like Harry than he used too and that the constant smile on Louis' face gave him away. That made Louis blush and pull Niall into a tight hug as Niall told him he were happy for him. Louis would never understand how he got so lucky to have Niall as his best friend, he was honestly the best anyone could wish for.

When Louis told Liam and Zayn they had shared a knowing look and smiled at him, Zayn saying that he had known there was something special between the two lads the first time he saw them together. Louis felt good with his friends knowing about his boyfriend and with the fact that he had a boyfriend. And not any boyfriend but Harry, Harry who he had known since he was a kid and who now was all grown up.

The way Louis and Harry acted around each other changed to a more domestic way and Louis spent most of his time at Harry's flat which was nicer than the one Louis and Niall shared. Niall and Oli mostly stayed there, at Louis' and Niall's flat that is, and Louis had heard a few too many things he hadn't wanted to to stay there.

It was less than a month into their relationship that they decided that Louis should move in with Harry, most of his things were there either way. Oli took Louis' old place in their shared appartement though the room that had been Louis' became a guestroom. Louis and Harry shared Harry's, well now their, bedroom. Harry's flat wasn't much bigger than Louis' old but it wasn't as old and shabby.

At the moment Louis and Harry were in the kitchen, Harry doing most of the cooking and Louis setting the table. Louis was glad Harry wasn't like the most Alpha's when it came to the roles in the household. Louis was shit at cooking, he knew the basics but he wasn't the one you would ask to cook something if you were hungry. He was quite shit at cleaning too, which Harry was doing almost every day. If he saw some dirt or there was something out of place he would fix it instantly. Louis usually waited til he really had to clean it up to do it.

He had been living with Harry for a week now and it felt natural for him, he didn't feel awkward wandering around in Harry's place. He didn't even count it as Harry's place really anymore, it was their place. Louis had gotten a job at the bookshop down the road and was helping Harry to pay for the taxes and their food. This was also something that Louis was glad for; he didn't want to lay everything on Harry, he wanted to be independent so that if things didn't work out with him and Harry he wouldn't be completely broke. Many alphas wanted their omegas to be home and take care of the home and ,if they had any, children. They wanted to support their omegas and control everything they spent their money on and everything they did in their lives.

Harry was different though, he wanted Louis to be able to take care of himself, to do what he wanted and felt like and he saw Louis as a person, not only as an omega. Louis honestly couldn't be happier.

He felt a pair of arms sneak their way around his waist as Harry hugged him from behind. Louis smiled softly and leaned back against him and tilted his head so he could meet Harry's eyes. Harry smiled back down at him and pecked his lips.

"Hi beautiful." he said and Louis felt heat rise to his cheeks as he blushed slightly.

"Hey handsome." he whispered back and Harry grinned before pecking his lips again. Harry hummed softly against Louis' lips before pulling away, only to kiss his cheek.

"Dinner's almost ready." Harry stated with a smile. It was Friday today and neither of them had work, they had both been in school and were kinda tired. It had been a long week and there was lots to do before winter break. They had both been busy in school and with work it was quite exhausting. Tonight though they were off and could relax all they wanted and just be with each other. They usually saw each other in school by lunch time but other than that they didn't see much of the other during the day. It was only in the evening when they had finished working that they had time for each other but by then they would both be tired.

They had been together for more than a month now and they hadn't had sex yet, well they had done a few hand/blow jobs and Harry had fingered Louis a couple of times til he was leaking and begging for more. It wasn't that they hadn't wanted to go further, they just wanted it to be special and not rush things. It was Harry's first time after all and Louis' first real time (he didn't want to count Mark, because that wasn't right they weren't in love and Louis hadn't wanted it, in heat or not.). Louis didn't really feel weird about doing sexual stuff with Harry, he trusted him with his life and knew Harry wanted him for more than his body and would never hurt him. When they had first done anything Louis had been nervous but it was clear Harry had been too, neither of them had ever really been with anybody like that. It had been great though and they weren't nervous around each other while doing it anymore.

Louis was sure they would go all the way soon enough, he was ready for it and he knew Harry wanted to. It was just a matter of time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's short and suck-ish. I've had a bit of a writers block and my mind has been else where. I'm leaving for Oxford the 15th of July and will be gone for about three weeks so I wont be able to update then. And umm yea I'm not sure if I should write a smut scene or not...so yea okay byyyyyeee :)x


	11. Chapter 11

"You know I love you, yea?" Harry asked a bit breathless, panting slightly against Louis' neck. Louis nodded and smiled facing the wall closest to the bed. They had been in this position for a while, Harry's knot keeping them from moving. Louis didn't mind at all.

It had been a perfect day. Harry had first woken him up with freshly made scrambled eggs and a cup of streaming tea. They had eaten together in bed, taking there time and then taken a shower together. The showering had been nothing but innocent, they had only shared a few kisses and shampooed each other's hair. After that they had studied together for a few hours, it was Louis' last year after all and he had tests he had to do well on. When they were done studying they made lunch together, Harry deciding they should make pasta and cheese, keeping it simple. They had gone out after that to one of the University parks not far away. They hadn't done much there, only walked around and enjoying the other's company. They ended up walking around for hours and then Harry took Louis home again so they could change into slightly fancier clothes. Harry in a simple white shirt, opting to keep the first few buttons undone and a pair of black skintight jeans. Louis dressed in pretty much the same but with less tight jeans, suspenders and only keeping the first button unbuttoned. Harry had kissed him hard when they were dressed and told him he looked sinfully good. Louis had giggled in responds before taking Harry's hand and walking out.

Harry had taken him to a fairly fancy restaurant and been all gentlemanly the entire night. When they came home they were both eager to get a taste of each other and they barely made it through the door before they were kissing. It was a hot kiss filled with lust and they made it to the bedroom in record time, Harry backing Louis onto the bed before holding himself up over Louis and snogging him. It was not long til they were both naked and Louis was lying on his stomach with a pillow beneath his hips to hold them up. Soon enough Harry was thrusting into a moaning Louis. It was so different from when Mark had done it with Louis, Harry was gentle in a way even when he was thrusting hard, he was kissing Louis' neck every now and then and moaning his name. Louis was enjoying this and it was not long until Harry's knot was starting to swell and tugging slightly at Louis' rim. With a last thrust Harry knotted the omega and that was enough to push Louis over the edge. They were both panting for a while before Harry rolled them to the side carefully and spooned Louis from behind, knowing they would be stuck like this for a while.

That's where they were now.  
"I love you too Haz." Louis whispered and Harry placed a soft kiss on Louis' neck.

"How are you feeling?" Harry whispered after a moment of silence. Louis leaned his head back onto Harry's chest and looked up at the alpha.

"Full, comfortable, happy." the smalled lad said softly with a smile. Harry pecked Louis' lips and smiled.

"That's nice to hear." he whispered and sighed happily. "I'm quite comfortable and happy too. I really really love you."

"And I really really love you." Louis answered with a giggle, earning another quick kiss from Harry.

"You're so cute." Harry said and Louis blushed slightly.

"Says the one with curls and dimples." Louis responded and Harry stuck his tongue out making Louis giggle again. Harry smiled in return at his boyfriend, this ending up with Louis poking his dimple and smiling brightly when Harry's smile widened. They laid in silence for a while after that, Harry's knot going down and making them able to move again.

"We should probably get cleaned up and change the sheets." Harry said and Louis nodded.

"We should." he agreed "But we could wait til tomorrow and sleep now instead."

"But it's dirty, we're dirty." Harry said and scrunched his nose up.

"Fine." Louis said with a dramatic sigh and Harry chuckled at him. Harry was first to stand up from the bed and picked Louis up in his arms, making the small omega yelp in surprise and cling onto him. "You could warn a lad next time before you pick him up."

"Sorry love." Harry pecked his lips before carrying him into the bathroom and putting him down on the cold sink making Louis hiss slightly at the cold against his bare bum. Harry gave him an apologetic smile and started the shower for the second time that day. They cleaned up quickly and Louis brushed his teeth while Harry changed the sheets. When Harry was done in the bathroom too they cuddled in the bed, falling asleep within minutes, both tired and content with the day's events.

Harry had gotten his perfect first time with the boy he loved and Louis got his second try together with someone he loved and wanted. He wasn't forced into it and he would do what he and Harry had over again. It was not at all the same as it had been for Louis with Mark and Louis thought that he could move on from it now. He didn't need to associate sex or knotting with something bad. Harry had showed him how good it could be and here in Harry's arms Louis felt more safe and comfortable than he ever had.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry for the very late update and this excuse of a chapter. I can't say I'm happy with how this turned out but whatever. I don't think there will be many more chapters now, maybe one or two idk. Hope you're all well xx

**Author's Note:**

> So this will be my new story and I hope you guys will like it, please tell me what you think so far. xx


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